Chronically Early

When my 15-minute Microsoft Outlook reminder pops up telling me that I have 15 minutes before my meeting, I pack my stuff up and head out right away. I’m usually the first one to arrive at a meeting, but I’d rather be too early than walk in late. In fact, I’d rather skip something altogether than show up tardy.

I hate being late for church, work, a project meeting or even dinner with friends. I have reoccurring nightmares about showing up late for class and getting demerits. I got demerits once for being late to a BJU Sunday morning service. Apparently, my one infraction caused more inner turmoil than I realized, and it continues to plague me even in my sleep. I am haunted by the memory. HA!

Today I had a funny thought while I was waiting on a meeting to get underway. Personally I freak out if I am going to be late, and when I arrive 2 minutes late I feel the need to apologize over and over for my tardiness, and yet, I don’t seem to be bothered much by other people being late to meet with me at all. I have friends who are typically running a few minutes behind, and it doesn’t phase me to wait on them. OK, 20-30 minutes is all right. I’m starting to wonder if I have the right location or not. Maybe I should call them? At 40 minutes late, without any phone calls or text messages, I’m starting to feel “stood up.” I’ll try calling again, and once we connect, I am just relieved to hear their voice and discover that they are alive and well. We’ll reschedule and move on. And yet, I would literally be flogging myself if I made any one wait on me like that.

Yet I don’t seem to have any problem making GOD wait on me...
I’ll get with YOU later, LORD. This is not a good time.
I’ll have to reschedule our heart-to-heart, LORD.
Not now, LORD. I am just not in the mood.
Wait a minute. I need to see how this movie ends, LORD.

OK, maybe I don’t say those things out loud, but that is exactly what I am stating with my actions. I owe HIM my all. Each second, each breath is a gift from HIM, and yet I struggle giving HIM 30 minutes or an hour of my time. Or I whine about having to get up early on Sunday morning to hear my pastor speak HIS Word.

So let's get this out in black and white, shall we! I don’t mind asking the MAKER of the Heavens and earth to wait on me, but I can’t handle holding up a friend I’m meeting for coffee? I don't seem to mind taking time away from my LORD and MASTER, but I panic at the thought of delaying a meeting with my boss or co-workers because of my tardiness? AHEM! Hmmmm...seems rather out of balance, doesn’t it? I’m too much of a people pleaser. I should attempt to use my time wisely with everyone but not lose sight of WHO actually owns my time, my life, my all.

LORD, I’m sorry that I try to put YOU on the back burner in my life. I should be out to please YOU above all else. Please forgive me for taking advantage of YOUR patience and long-suffering.

Help me to make time for YOU.
Help me to need time with YOU.
Help me to want more time with YOU.