Sunday, May 16, 2010

Showing Love

I’m perplexed and a bit muddled.

A Christian musical artist came out of the closet recently, and there has been a flurry of web chatter on the subject within the Christian community. Supporters and name-callers have both emerged, and it has left me both sad and puzzled: LORD, how should I respond? I know what the Bible says about practicing homosexuality. GOD calls it sin, but I am not sure what my response should be to a brother or sister involved in a same-sex relationship.

One of my dearest friends from college is gay. He told me within 6 months after we graduated from our ultra-conservative Christian university, and my response was harsh and condemnatory. I was void of all compassion. I lashed out. I quoted Scripture at him--all of which he knew well. I judged him severely. I was bitter and resentful.

Fact is that at the time I was devastated for personal reasons. He had only chosen to share his secret with me because I had opened up and told him that I was wrestling with a secret of my own – romantic feelings for him. He didn’t want to hurt me. He revealed his secret only out of necessity at the time. He wanted to spare me more pain, and I know it was horribly hard and risky for him to open up to me like he did, but I think that my own personal baggage was what made me react so violently. I was angry with my self. Why did I not know? What was wrong with me? Why hadn’t I realized the truth on my own?

In time, we managed to salvage our friendship. He gave me space, and I needed it. Eventually, I realized that I cared about him too much to just walk away completely. I loved him, and maybe I had gotten confused about the type of love we shared, but the love was real regardless. He was dear to me, and so we repaired some of the breach and moved forward, but our friendship has never quite been the same. It was natural that it changed really. Time and distance will do that, but I’ve often wished that I had responded differently. Even though I’m not sure what the right response should have been, I’m not proud of how I handled the situation at all.

We are all sinners (Romans 3:23), hopelessly lost and in need of a Redeemer. We are all living in sin – every one of us. Some sins appear more blatant or obvious than others, but that doesn’t fool GOD. HE knows our hearts, our inmost thoughts. HE knows well my own wickedness and depravity. So when is it my place to point the finger at another person?

LORD, I am seeking Your face. Guide me. Give me the wisdom and compassion to respond as YOU want me to. Help me to love others as You do. Show me how. Teach me.
John 13:35 "By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."

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