What I Thought I Wanted…**

I’m glad GOD doesn’t give us everything we want. That HE doesn’t act like a personal genie in a bottle where we get whatever we wish for. If I had everything my little heart had ever wished for, I would be an incredibly miserable person.

1. I don’t think George Clooney could make me happy. Sure, I’d love to live in an Italian villa, be able to travel around the world and spend my money how I pleased, but I think that jet-setting lifestyle would get old pretty fast.

2. I doubt that I’d be all that fun to hang out with if I had gotten on the all-time bestseller book list by my 30th birthday. I’d be cranky and ticked that everyone would keep asking when my next book would be coming out. Come on having one book on the best-seller list is a big deal. Stop pressuring me, people!! HA!

3. I think I’d be bored to tears if I lived in a lush English country estate with my husband as a titled member of the nobility and had to hob-nob with the uppercrust of society. Come on, I’m just not all that refined, and having to attend all those snobby events and pretend that I like to dress up. I get chills just thinking about it.

No seriously, there are lots of things over the years that I thought I wanted. Things I prayed about and asked GOD for, and today looking back now at those things and those periods in my life, I can clearly see how GOD was protecting me from my self. Yes, HE protected me from my self. I didn’t need that other job, that relationship wasn’t what HE wanted, and more of this or that wasn’t in HIS plan either.

Sure, I can’t help but wish for life to be a bit easier than it is. This has been a difficult year for me, but GOD never promised me an easy, carefree life. HE has promised however to be here with me, to never leave or forsake me. HE is here with me in the difficulties, the stressful times, the health scares, the aching moments, the job woes, the inner turmoils, etc. HE has given me more than enough already. HE gave HIS SON. HE has more than provided for my needs and continues to do so. I already have all that I need. It is sufficient.

And what should my response be? Gratitude! Thank you, LORD!

“I keep wanting You to be fair
But that’s not what You said
I want certain answers to these prayers
But that’s not what You said...

What it was I wanted, what I got instead
Leaves me broken and grateful...

I want to be broken, peaceful, faithful, grateful...”**

**What I Thought I Wanted by Sara Groves