Happy 4th Anniversary!

Four years ago today, I posted my first blog posting ever. [sigh!] Hard to believe it has been 4 years, but what a ride it has been.

Together we've...

enjoyed the blessings of GOD
thrilled at the awesome privilege of being an Aunt
chatted about the joys and turmoils of single life
discussed the malicious intent of spiders
pined for George Clooney
traveled around the country and down memory lane
found kindred spirits
managed to keep sane amidst the drama
learned how important relationship is on our walk
reviewed music, movies, musicals and books
become addicted to facebook but made a full recovery
dissed Valentine's Day (Single Awareness Day)
snapped photos regularly
fought off 2 invading armies of crickets
been charmed by the likes of Mr. Darcy and Mr. Rochester
explored city parks, museums and gardens
talked about the highs and lows of friendship
caught up on local culture
enjoyed the excitement of several beautiful weddings
thrilled at the perfect formation of a delightful turn of phrase
been captivated by art, architecture and photography
fallen in love with a serial killer (but he is just fictional)
dieted and tried to get healthier
signed up for eharmony and then immediately bailed
become a biker again
laughed about the irony
searched for a new church home and then returned to the old
discovered how scary doctor-prescribed steroids can be
reconnected with old friends
enjoyed city life
gotten caught up in apartment living drama
gotten people lost with our navigation skills
appreciated the blessing of having awesome girlfriends
realized our own special gifts like Spi-Dar and sarcasm
crushed over a guy or two [sigh!]
learned how important a good night's sleep can be
been enraptured with the beauty of a sunset or a glorious dahlia
googled a bit too often perhaps
and laughed a whole bunch.

WOW! It's been quite an adventure. Thanks for coming along on my journey! I've definitely been better off for having had you alongside. Thank you!

What Do I Want to Be When I Grow Up

It's such a hard question. My answer for the last 18 years or so has been that I wanted to write, and I still do. I am. But what kind of writer do I want to be?

I always thought I wanted to be the next great female novelist. I was going to be the Jane Austen of my time. I was going to be published by 30 and change the world of literature as we knew it. It would be dramatic, fierce and compelling. I would challenge, make people weep and bring about a insurgent revival of character development in novels.

RIGHT! So that didn't quite pan out. I tried numerous times to get a novel started. I made it through 6 chapters on one attempt, but that was as far as I ever got on any of my novel attempts.

1. The perfectionist in me couldn't just leave my draft alone. I would strive for the perfect phrasing of every line. I was working and reworking each paragraph as I writing it, and I couldn't leave well enough alone. When I should have been just bursting to get the story down on the screen or page, I would get hung up on a particular line and just couldn't move on until it was perfected.

2. I didn't think writing about what I knew was very interesting, and so I kept trying to delve into the depths of my imagination. Well, that didn't work out all that well either. Something was missing. My heart wasn't in it, and I grew discouraged. I never stopped writing entirely, but I didn't share my thoughts with anyone.

Skip ahead a couple of years...here I am 34 years old, and I'm no closer to my earlier dream of becoming the next great American novelist. I don't know what the future holds for me, and yet somehow, I'm OK with the status quo, too. I'm writing. Some of which appears here on my blog. And while I may not be captivating you with my prose or changing the course of destiny with my gripping conviction, I am writing. Writing what I know (which isn't much), but it is my experience, my firsthand knowledge of the world I am encountering daily. I'm enjoying it and rediscovering my love of words. Thanks for joining me, my friend.

I'm So Ready...

Every year about the middle of October IT happens. I start getting antsy to put up my Christmas tree. By Halloween, I’m ready to succumb to the temptation and drag out the boxes and tubs of decorations and get my Christmas on. Now for the last couple of years, I’ve tried to resist the urge as long as possible, but by mid-November, I can’t handle it. I’m too psyched to deck the halls again. So, I give in. And this year is no different. I’m so ready. Any day now...

I love going through my ornaments--unwinding each tissue-wrapped selection and delicately placing it on my tree. Each box holds another treasure, another little something to rediscover again. Sadly, most of my decorations are brand new due to the infamous mold episode a couple of years back. [sniffle, sniffle!] Gone are the sentimental ornaments from my childhood, but that hasn’t really changed my passion for holiday decorations.

I’ll vigorously attempt to reshape my holiday wreath for the door. I’ll light scented candles and bask in the glow. I’ll giggle with glee as I shake up my snow globe and wind up the music box. I’ll glide and spin across the floor in rhythm to my Nat King Cole Christmas CD or sigh to the musical renditions of Michael Buble. [BIG SIGH!] Yeah, life is good!

Now you may think this is disloyal of me. After all, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, but somehow in a way, decorating for Christmas gets me ready for Thanksgiving. Yes, Thanksgiving often gets lost in our scramble for Christmas, but it is still on the calendars. I love how America still sets aside a day -- not just for football as my brothers would have us believe, not just time for family and delicious food and not for shopping or catching sleep before the big shopping day to come -- but a day set aside to be thankful, to express our gratitude to GOD for the bountiful blessings of life. Yes, it's time to get our praise on...**


**Disclaimer: Somehow it just sounds wrong when I say "get your praise on." Worship leaders can say it, cool musicians can sing it, but this "I-grew-up-fundamental-Baptist-girl" just can't get it out right. HA! Now, I'm leaving it in there. I'm trying to keep it real and leave it unedited. I just think it sounds funny coming from me, don't you?

Can't We Just Get Along

Do you ever catch yourself being sucked into the ongoing drama unfolding around you? You really just want to stay “out of it,” but somehow you catch yourself getting brought along for the ride?

I don’t mind listening. I strive to be a decent listener, but sometimes I wonder where that line is. When is it OK to just say I can’t listen anymore because this just isn’t productive?

I wish we could all check our baggage at the door and really be unbiased and strive to make the BEST decisions for all, but no one is really able to be completely objective. We all have our own agendas. We’re human. We’re selfish. We hold grudges. And yet, I can’t help but think that there must be a way for us to work together and make things better. I want to help and be the peacemaker in these situations with my friends and co-workers, but some days, I would love to just lock some people in a room together, tell them to deal with it and make them stay in there until they have the situation resolved. Tough love, I guess.

Come on. Talk to one another, reason with one another, step into another’s shoes for a moment. Life is too short to be spent squabbling about insignificant issues or bringing up past wrongs. Let it go. Please can't we just try to get along?

LORD, give us the strength and wisdom to get along with our fellow sojourners on this planet. Help us to let go of the past and look ahead to the future with fresh eyes guided by your omniscient hand. Help us to love others as you love us!

Psalm 34:14 Depart from evil and do good; Seek peace and pursue it.

Psalm 37:37 Consider the blameless, observe the upright; there is a future for the man of peace.

Rekindling An Old Relationship

This week, I met up with an old friend on Monday, and then we got together again last night, too. It's been really good. This reconnection was rather unexpected since it had been a few years since our last encounter. I wasn't sure how things would go the second time around. I had my doubts, but life is full of surprises, isn't it?

I quickly discovered that Billy hasn't changed much at all. He is much as he always was, and I appreciate that about him. He has so much more energy than I do. I struggle to keep up sometimes, but he is a great encouragement and definitely a motivator. I have made quite a few changes since we last met, and maybe that has made all the difference. Getting together has been much better than before, and I've really been enjoying our time.

WAIT A MINUTE!! HOLD ON!! You're not thinking that this is a romantic relationship, are you? Silly you! This is me and Billy Blanks I'm talking about, and he is happily married to his teenage sweetheart. Yes, Billy is the fitness guy that had those popular Tae-Bo workout videos a few years back. Sound familiar? Sorry if I mislead you there...hee hee!

Well, I dusted off my VHS tapes this week and have been using them again as part of my cold-weather-workout-routine in the evenings. I love the upper cuts and jabs, the back kicks and roundoff kicks. All in all, it's a really great workout for just 25 minutes a day, and this time, I'm nearly keeping up with my friend Billy there on the screen. WOOHOO!! I love it.

DISCLAIMER: So, if you happen to catch me going around punching the air or practicing my kicks, I'm not really losing my mind or fighting off imaginary creatures or something. I'm just practicing my Tae-Bo again. But I should caution you to make sure to keep a safe distance from me if I am in the zone. I'm quite the lethal weapon these days! HA!

FATHER, Are You Picking On Me?

I have had several encounters lately where GOD has put me in situations where I am forced to reopen wounds and deal with an area in my life I continually struggle with. It’s an area just under the surface that keeps bubbling up. I’ve prayed about it. I’ve turned it over to GOD so many times, and yet, it never completely seems to go away.

After a rough Sunday last week, I prayed for mercy and that GOD would be gracious and help me in my struggle and make this week better. Well, yesterday I encountered more of the same scenario, only this time it was much worse. I headed home in tears, pouring out my heart to GOD on my drive. I found myself voicing the following words:

Really, LORD? Was that necessary? I actually feel like YOU are being mean here, but I know YOU are not. YOU are good. I know YOU are good. But today was really hard, LORD. I’m hurting, and YOU were the only ONE in that room that knew my struggle, that knew my heart. YOU alone knew how that would affect me. I desperately wanted YOU to have my back, LORD, and yet, YOU allowed it to happen again. I know YOU are with me and YOU are allowing this in my life, and I’m trying to accept it, but quite honestly I don’t know how. I don’t know what YOU are wanting in all of this, except that YOU want to be praised and glorified. Show me how.

I felt better just saying those words and having a heart-to-heart with GOD. Like the Psalmist, I think we need to be real with GOD. And yesterday I was real. I was raw. I was direct. And if we come to HIM in the right frame of mind, I don’t think GOD minds that we ask those questions, that we seek to know HIM better and to figure out what HE is doing.

In a way, I think GOD harps on us sometimes, to pick at that scab in our lives that never fully heals (OK, that was a bit graphic, but I think a lot of you know what I mean). HE wants to bring the ultimate healing, but we have to let HIM work HIS medicine. We all have these areas in our lives that tend to rise up and give us trouble over and over. And when HE could keep those struggles at bay and make things easier on us, HE instead allows us to struggle with them again and again.

Sure, I would have appreciated things being simpler yesterday, but somehow I know HE’s not being mean. HE’s not being unfaithful. HE’s reminding me that HE wants to be first in my life, and that there is more work to be done. This is an area, where HE feels I can do better. HE’s not done with this. More work to do on this one, Mel. And so we began again.

HE is faithful.
HE is good.
HE will see me through.

Job 23:10 Yet He knows the way I have taken; when He has tested me, I will emerge as pure gold.

I really like Sara Groves’ song Less Like Scars...

It's been a hard year
But I'm climbing out of the rubble
These lessons are hard
Healing changes are subtle
But every day it's
Less like tearing, more like building
Less like captive, more like willing
Less like breakdown, more like surrender
Less like haunting, more like remember

And I feel you here
And you're picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars and more like character

Less like a
prison, more like my room
It's less like a casket, more like a womb
Less like dying, more like transcending
Less like fear, less like an ending

Just a little while ago
I couldn't feel the power or the hope
I couldn't cope, I couldn't feel a thing
Just a little while back
I was desperate, broken, laid out, hoping You would come

And I need you
And I want you here
And I feel you

And I know you're here
And you're picking up the pieces
Forever faithful
It seemed out of my hands, a bad, bad situation
But you are able
And in your hands the pain and hurt
Look less like scars and more like character

Catching Up On Tunes

I borrowed some of my sister’s CD collection about a month ago. I guess I wanted to change up what I had been listening to. I wanted some music with a little less edge and somehow Nickelback’s Superstar wasn’t doing that for me. AHEM!

So now, I’m discovering singers that I have never heard of like Chris Rice. He’s got several Christian albums out there, and my sister had one, Past the Edges from 1998. I know, I'm way behind on Christian music.

The first track on the album just grabbed me, Smellin’ Coffee. I like it despite the obvious coffee references. You all know how this Midwest girl feels about coffee. YUCK! But wait, actually, I do like the smell of coffee...HA! It’s just the taste I can’t handle. It's just not the same as Diet Mountain Dew.

Anyway, this song is really good...

Last thing I remember, sayin’ bye to yesterday
Glad to see it over, pullin’
covers over my head
But what were You doin’
While I dreamt the night away
Cause I can tell that somethings different
And my eyes ain’t even open yet

I’m smellin coffee
Birds are singin’ just outside
Here comes Your mercy streamin’ in with the morning light
My heart is racing waking up to Your smile
It’s a good morning, yeah
It’s a good morning

Well I remember readin’
You’re the God who never sleeps
And while I’ve been dreamin’
You’ve been singing over me, yeah
Singin’ about my freedom
Wakin’ me up to hear Your song
And now I can’t dance hard enough
Cause yesterday is gone, gone, gone!

Every little breath, every heartbeat
Is a gift of love that You give to me
You keep givin when I’m asleep
Cause I know You never stop watchin’ over me
I wake up, my past is gone
Cause Your mercys new with the morning sun
I’m forgiven, I’m free, it’s a brand new day
Cause Your faithfulness is the greatest!

Freedom to Vote

America isn't perfect, and our system for voting is far from it, but it is still a privilege and a blessing to live in a country where we can cast our ballot and let our voice be heard.

I stood in line for about an hour and 25 minutes this morning waiting to vote. See, I thought I’d be smart and go early. I got to the polls at 6:25 AM, and the line was already snaked around inside the building and then out the door. Yeah! So I guess, I should have been there by 5:30 AM to get to work on time at 7:30 AM. HA!

There were 2 precincts voting at the same location today, and 19 out of 20 voters were there to vote in the same precinct (mine). So, you can imagine the chatter going on about that. Talk about some serious precinct realignment that needs to happen! I later found out that I live in one of the largest precincts in the state. Hmmmm...I never knew that.

Despite the long wait, it certainly never got boring. One couple that was behind me was particularly entertaining. He was quoting Monty Python lines as we slowly inched along in line, and she was trying to hush him. Together the 3 of us tried to come up with better ways of getting people through the lines. They had broken our precinct down into 2 separate lines: one for last names beginning with A-M and the other for N-Z. Not a perfect plan at all! The A-M sign-in sheet stacks were double, maybe triple the size of the N-Z stack. We kept discussing how they needed to break up the A-M into smaller sections, and then we shared our insights with a poll judge who was there. Wouldn’t you know it that he took our advice and got it all set up to do just what we had suggested with the folks just behind us! We laughed about how we were all for the common good, and that it sure was democratic of us even though we weren’t to benefit from the change. HA!

I cast my vote and rushed to the office 30+ minutes late, but it was worth it. My vote will be counted, and I got to have my say. Whether or not I will like all of today’s results and whether or not a scandal over the results or the ballots will ensue, I still got to exercise a freedom I am privileged to share with my fellow American citizens. A freedom I hope to NEVER take for granted.

Thank you, LORD! I'm glad to know that no matter what the outcome of today's election, YOU are really the ONE in charge of my future!

Diet Girl Hits Another Milestone

Today I weighed in, and I had lost just a bit more weight, but it was enough to give me the grand total of 60 pounds lost since April 1st. WOOHOO!! Now, the weight loss has definitely been slowing down since September, but there is usually one good week per month which gives me a 2 or 3 pound weight loss. The rest of the weeks, I am scrambling to lose a pound or less, but there are a couple of good things about gradually taking the weight off.

1. THEY all say that slow and steady is the way to go when it comes to weight loss. I don’t know exactly who “THEY” is. No one will tell me. But I am hopeful that if my doctor believes them, then maybe THEY are correct.

2. Buying a new wardrobe every other month has been getting expensive, and so maybe a slow weight loss will help my budget and allow me to get more wear out of the clothes I have already purchased. I have been hitting up the local consignment and Goodwill stores as much as possible, but due to my vertically challenged frame, it is a bit harder to find clothes the right size for me in secondhand shops, and so I'm still having to spend more money than I would like on clothing. One side effect of all of this excess shopping is that I am starting to like it, and that is a first for me. DANGER! DANGER!

3. It gives me motivation to get more active. With the cooler temps and fall couch-potato-syndrome in full swing, I’ve been slacking off on my regular walking and biking. I know the season for bike riding is coming to an end, but I’ve still got more weeks for walking ahead, I think. I’m also trying to determine whether or not to join a fitness center. I dread it, but it might be a good course of action for me. I’m still pondering the idea.

But regardless of what is ahead and however long this process is going to take me, 60 pounds is a lot of weight to lose. I’m already feeling healthier and better able to keep up with my fit friends.

If you’ve never struggled with your weight, count your blessings and be thankful for a working metabolism and good genetics. I’m trying not to hate you. Just kidding! Seriously, you are blessed. Enjoy it!

To all of the rest of us, who struggle to stay active and wish for skinny genes, hang in there. Call me, and we can go walking together or do a food intervention on the phone. Don’t be discouraged. Regardless of our size, our skin color, our frame, or any other element of our appearance – we were made in the image of GOD. We are HIS creation and the work of HIS hands, and HE loves us unconditionally.

Psalm 139:14 [KJV] I will praise THEE; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are THY works; and that my soul knoweth right well.

Trick or Treat

I went up to Kokomo this past weekend and passed out candy at my sister's house while she and Jonathan took their 3 kids out trick or treating. I love doing that! I love seeing all the different costumes and trying to figure out what the kids are dressed up as. It does get difficult some times. Two 12-year-olds informed me that they were dead skateboarders. WOW! I wouldn't have guessed that...EVER. I love kids.

There is just something fun about Halloween. I know, there are plenty of people out there who don't like the holiday, but I sure do. I grew up with Halloween as a fun day to dress up and get candy, and that's the way I still see it. I don't like to dress up anymore myself, but I appreciate it when others do. It's a fun holiday!

By the way, I only had one piece of candy...a pomegranate Tootsie Pop. It was a delicious 1 point treat, and I enjoyed every momentous lick to the tootsie roll center.