I Have Slowly Become An Office Scrooge...

when it comes to pitch-ins. We have treat days for birthdays, holidays, company anniversaries for 5-10-15-20+ years, employees of the month, baby showers, wedding showers, the birth of new puppies, surviving an ingrown toenail, etc. OK, so I made the last couple up, but you get the drift. We have these soirees more than once a month. And it’s not that I don’t want to celebrate with these people. I think they deserve the recognition for their achievements, growing families, etc. It’s a special thing, and I can appreciate that, but...

1. I tire of having to bring in food all the time. It seems like there is always another celebration or party table in the works. They started planning the big Christmas luncheon pitch-in in early July. It’s always a lot of fun, but part of me dreads it all the same.

2. I don’t like having the temptation of delicious food sitting just down the hall from me. The cheesecake, cake donuts, banana bread, ice cream, donut holes, Swiss chocolates, pies, Hostess Twinkies, carrot cake, cream-filled donuts (did I mention donuts already?)--are you kidding me?? These items are sheer torture and a test of my determination. I’ve already blogged about how I don’t like it when one of my attorneys puts a box of Panera Bread bagels on my countertop for all to enjoy...well, it is also hard having tasty morsels placed anywhere nearby. Diet Girl has some will power, but let’s not forget, she is still just a human wearing a hypothetical mask and cape.

3. I want to know why is it that the office assistants, the low women on the totem pole, are always the ones relegated to bringing in treats. It’s like someone had a brilliant idea one day...I know, let’s have those that make the LEAST amount of money and work the MOST hours bring in the food. Seems totally logical, right? WRONG!!!

AHHHH HUMBUG!!!

All right, I’m done whining about this now. I’m going back for a second helping. GOTCHA! You didn’t really think I was going to do that, did you? Nah. Diet Girl brought in fresh fruit (courtesy of Marsh) and a nonfat yogurt fruit dip, and that is all Diet Girl is going to consume for breakfast. I am content...